Mindfulness and Mental Health: Beyond Just “Taking a Breath”
Vitality Collective | Counselling Clinics in Vancouver, Surrey, & Chilliwack
Prepared by: Chelsea Stenner, MA, Executive Director, Registered Clinical Counsellor
Mindfulness is a word you hear everywhere, and most of us have a general idea of what it is. But it’s also an easy word to brush off. When someone recommends trying mindfulness, meditation, or breath work, a common internal response is often, “Yeah, yeah, got it”—and we mentally move on to the next thing. In fact, our booking team often hears requests like, “Please don’t book me with someone who’s just going to tell me to breathe.” The first truth is, mindfulness is both an art and a science, and it’s profoundly effective. However, without understanding the science-based, and neurobiological reasons behind it, people often overlook its potential as a powerful resource both in and outside of therapy. The second truth is, forming helpful coping strategies is HARD—it takes time, patience, and deliberate practice every day to see changes and develop new habits. It may be an important question to ask yourself if you’ve given mindfulness an honest shot.
As a former skeptic and as someone with very little time, I’m here to advocate for mindfulness and, just maybe, to change your mind about it. Many blog posts online are fairly surface-level in describing its benefits, but here, I want to take a deeper dive with you to look at the science and intersections with therapy.
Understanding Your Nervous System and Why Mindfulness Matters
Our nervous systems—essentially the highways that connect what’s happening in our brains to our bodies and vice versa—are naturally wired to handle both stress and calm. Polyvagal Theory, developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, offers a framework for understanding how our autonomic nervous system (ANS) manages stress and influences our emotional and social experiences. The theory identifies three primary states or "branches" that respond to cues of safety or danger.
Ventral Vagal State: This mindful state is associated with social engagement, calm, and a sense of safety. When we feel connected and secure, this state dominates, enabling clear thinking and open communication.
Sympathetic State: This state activates when we perceive danger, triggering a fight-or-flight response. It involves increased heart rate and adrenaline, priming us for quick action. Prolonged time in this state can lead to chronic anxiety and panic.
Dorsal Vagal State: Linked to immobilization or shutdown, this state occurs when we feel hopeless or unable to escape perceived threats, leading to withdrawal or numbness. Prolonged time in this state can lead to depression, fatigue, and feeling disconnected.
These states influence how we think, feel, and engage with the world around us.
The Window of Tolerance (developed by Dan Siegel, Professor of Psychiatry at UCLA) aligns with Polyvagal Theory, representing the range within which a person can function optimally under stress, staying connected and regulated. When within this window, a person can manage challenges effectively without becoming overwhelmed. But when stressors exceed what feels manageable, we may shift outside this window—either into hyperarousal (sympathetic state) or hypoarousal (dorsal vagal state). Mindfulness practices help expand this Window of Tolerance by fostering present-moment awareness and enhancing our capacity to notice stress signals before they become overwhelming. Through mindfulness, individuals learn to stay grounded, recognize emotional or physiological shifts, and use techniques like deep breathing or grounding exercises to return to a balanced state. Over time, this practice builds resilience, helping individuals remain within their Window of Tolerance, even in stressful situations, and promotes emotional balance and well-being.
Creating a Mindful Practice in Modern Life
Mindful practice is essential for surviving modern-day life. Nearly every demographic is experiencing the strains of 2024. From family dynamics, work-life balance, economic pressures, digital overload, health issues, and more… Here are a few scenarios that illustrate how modern-day demands affect us all:
Young Family with Dual Careers
Megan, a mother of two young children, works full-time as a project manager while her partner, Tom, is self-employed in contracting. Together, they juggle demanding careers, broken sleep, preschool drop-offs, and a household budget stretched by inflation and childcare costs. Megan often feels the “mental load” of managing domestic tasks—everything from coordinating the children’s schedules and planning meals to remembering appointments, bills, and birthdays. She and Tom work extra hours to keep up financially, leaving little time for self-care or nurturing their relationship. Their evenings are packed with chores and prepping for the next day, and weekends are spent catching up on tasks. Social media, which Megan scrolls through in brief breaks, shows a curated view of others’ “perfect” lives, adding to her stress and sense of inadequacy. The cumulative effect keeps Megan in a constant state of fight-or-flight, with physical symptoms like headaches and insomnia, or emotional symptoms like irritability with her kids and partner. Sometimes, when faced with too many demands, she even experiences a “freeze” response, overwhelmed by work and family needs, and wants to hide under the covers or just scroll mindlessly on her phone.
Young Adult Balancing Multiple Demands
Rajvir, a third-year university student, lives at home to save on expenses. He juggles full-time studies in a rigorous program, a part-time job to cover costs, and unpaid internships for relevant experience. His days are packed with classes, work, and assignments, leaving him little time for socializing or relaxation. His parents’ hopes for him to secure a stable career create additional pressure. Rajvir feels overwhelmed by constant notifications—dating apps, emails, school announcements, social media—all pulling him in multiple directions. He often feels stuck or paralyzed when tackling assignments, as he’s constantly on high alert, struggling with exhaustion and burnout. Sometimes he drinks more than he knows is good for him, to help take the edge off.
Older Couple Facing Retirement and Health Changes
Terry and Bill are in their late 60s and downsizing to a smaller condo. Their adult children have moved to other cities for affordability, leaving an “empty nest.” Bill recently retired, and Terry faces health issues, bringing new emotional and financial stresses. Rising healthcare costs weigh on them, and they’re uncertain about how to afford the lifestyle they want on a fixed income. With a shrinking social circle, they feel isolated, missing the purpose they found in work and family life. Terry often feels “frozen,” overwhelmed by the decisions around downsizing and aging, while social media can heighten feelings of distance from their children and friends, adding to their sense of loss.
Each of these scenarios shows how the demands of modern life contribute to the chronic stress involved with living above and below one’s personal Window of Tolerance. These demands pull people away from personal space, chip away slowly and steadily at resiliency, and leave little room for recovery. This cumulative stress can keep the nervous system in a constant state of activation, leading to low mood, overwhelm, and burnout. Then, when something really unexpected and life-altering happens, like the death of a loved one, divorce, or a serious health issue occurs… there just isn’t enough bandwidth in the Window of Tolerance to absorb the blow.
Learning from the Nordic Approach to Time and Self-Care
I recently read that in Nordic countries, people prioritize their financial health by saving before spending, while in North America, we tend to spend first and save what’s left. I think we could apply this model to our other precious resources—our time, energy, and mental health. What if we intentionally carved out time for mindfulness first instead of leaving it for whatever is “left over” at the end of the day (if there is anything left)? Practicing mindfulness as a priority supports your nervous system, making it more resilient to life’s demands. You can also use technology mindfully by setting reminders for breathing exercises, quick meditation, or remembering three things you’re grateful for in the moment.
Building Resiliency for Challenging Times
Viktor Frankl, an Austrian neurologist, psychiatrist, and Holocaust survivor, contributor to existential therapy, emphasized that when we cannot change our circumstances, we can change ourselves. If we can’t change the outer world, we can transform our internal environment. In therapy, mindfulness often plays a significant role in the safety and stabilization stage, where your therapist will assess your resources, coping strategies, strengths, and support systems while introducing tools and practices to create a strong foundation for deeper processing. This is especially crucial for trauma work, as grounding skills help clients stay present and within their Window of Tolerance during emotionally intense sessions. Staying grounded enables the brain and body to absorb transformative experiences and helps shift old survival patterns that are no longer useful.
Take a moment to reflect on what your own Window of Tolerance is like right now. Are you calm, present, and in the middle? Or are you above or below your window? Regardless of your present circumstances, even if you’re late to dropping the kids off and school or getting to work on time, taking even one deep breath right now creates room for you to exist. I invite you to pause and take a breath with me now.
Find a Therapist in Vancouver, Surrey, Chilliwack, or Online in BC | Our Best Match Approach
High-quality professional counselling starts with finding an experienced counsellor for the issues you’re facing. Please connect with our care coordinator team (info@vitalitycollective.ca) or fill out our New Client Inquiry form to meet with a Registered Clinical Counsellor best us