How to help your teen navigate mental health struggles
Being a parent is one of the toughest roles we play in life
And when our teenagers are struggling, we can feel confused, helpless, and overwhelmed when we don’t know how to help. The following are some important health symptoms to keep track of when it comes to your child or teen.
Changes in eating and sleeping habits
Sadness or hopelessness
Irritability, anger, hostility
Fatigue or lack of energy
Tearfulness or frequent crying
Withdrawal from friends and family
Loss of interest in activities
Lack of enthusiasm and motivation
Unexplained aches and pains
Thoughts of death or suicide
If your child is experiencing any of these symptoms on a persistent ongoing basis (2 or more weeks), it is important to intervene and start an honest and open conversation about their health. It may also be time to seek help from a physician and/or mental health professional. Our minds and bodies are connected; emotional issues can manifest as physical symptoms, and physical illnesses can affect our mental wellbeing.
Mental health is health.
Here are some facts from the Canadian Mental Health Association on how mental illness affects youth:
It is estimated that 10-20% of Canadian youth are affected by a mental illness or disorder – the single most disabling group of disorders worldwide.
Today, approximately 5% of male youth and 12% of female youth, age 12 to 19, have experienced a major depressive episode.
The total number of 12-19 year olds in Canada at risk for developing depression is a staggering 3.2 million.
Once depression is recognized, help can make a difference for 80% of people who are affected, allowing them to get back to their regular activities.
Mental illness is increasingly threatening the lives of our children; with Canada’s youth suicide rate the third highest in the industrialized world.
Suicide is among the leading causes of death in 15-24 year old Canadians, second only to accidents; 4,000 people die prematurely each year by suicide.
Schizophrenia is youth’s greatest disabler as it strikes most often in the 16 to 30 year age group, affecting an estimated one person in 100.
Surpassed only by injuries, mental disorders in youth are ranked as the second highest hospital care expenditure in Canada.
In Canada, only 1 out of 5 children who need mental health services receives them.
How do I communicate with a teen who may be experiencing symptoms of mental illness?
Helpguide.org is a great resource to help adults and parents communicate with youth about their concerns. This guide details the importance of listening and not lecturing, being gently persistent, acknowledging feelings without judgement, and simply trusting your gut on responses. It also provides three great tips on how to help teens when they are struggling with depression:
1) Encourage social connection
– talking face to face, combat social isolation, connection through activities and volunteerism
2) Make physical health a priority
– physical activity, nutritious meals, limiting screen time, and encouraging healthy sleeping habits
3) Know when to seek professional help
– when what you’re doing is not helping enough, it’s time to seek help from a physician and/or mental health professional who has experience in working with children or teens.
The important thing is to be gentle with whichever approach you use, and be prepared for resistance. Mental illness is complex as any other physical illness. There are no quick fixes, the journey can be a long one, and you do not have to do it alone. Your youth’s school counsellor may be able to help with community resources and referrals, as well as facilitating conversations about mental health.
We are feeling the symptoms of living in a world where we are more technologically connected than ever, and yet missing deeper more meaningful connections in the process. Our children are born into this exceedingly technologically connected world and we need to help them balance these experiences with some real face time. We must also remember to model the change we would like to see in our teens; we need to show that we can lead a life of meaningful connections, and implement strategies for mental wellness and self-care into our daily routines.
Teenagers don’t need perfect adults as role models.
They need authentic role models who show that it is normal to struggle and how sharing these experiences can help foster resilience.
Inder Kauldher, MC, RCC
Inder has extensive experience working with adolescents, adults, and families through her work in the public school system, Child and Youth Mental Health, and private practice. She also specializes in areas of depression, anxiety, life transitions, burnout, pregnancy and postpartum mental health, and cross-cultural issues. For communication with the author, please direct your correspondence here: inder.kauldher@gmail.com
References
Canadian Mental Health Association https://cmha.ca/fast-facts-about-mental-illness
HelpGuide: Your trusted guide to mental health & wellness https://www.helpguide.org/